Till a few years ago, divorce was pretty unheard of in India, and we believed that two people had no option but to hate each other after a break up or divorce. One reason is that our films and media showed us images of ugly breakups and we could not imagine an alternative to the messy breakups we saw on screen and in books.

But today divorce and breakups are common. We see Hrithik Roshan and Suzanne Khan going on movie dates and generally being friends even after divorce. There are other people who have maintained a dignified stance after a breakup. But how easy or difficult is it really to keep things dignified after you go through a painful breakup?

One big reason to maintain a friendly relationship is children. If you have kids, you don’t want them to grow up in a messy environment full of hatred and blame. You want them to have a normal childhood. So trying to have a casual friendly relationship with your ex is essential.

But remember, before you do that, a cool-off period is reuired. After your breakup or divorce, you need to keep distance for some time. You both need this time to heal from the pain and loss you just went through.

When you feel ready to forgive, forget and move on, it is time to start being friends again. Whatever you do, do not make the mistake of falling back for each other. So a little distance needs to be maintained. It is also important if you hope to find love again. Treat your ex like any other friend, and things will become simple and manageable.

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