Pavitra wrote in to us saying that she is getting married in a few weeks. She has known Rajesh, her fiance for over 6 months now, but Pavitra still lacks the confidence of being happy with him for the rest of her life. Pavitra has asked Memsaab to give her a few tips on how to make a modern marriage work. Needless to say, these tips are very different from what your grandma might have said to you about successful mariages!
New-Age Tips For Successful Marriages
1. It's Okay to Fight. Communication is the key to a happy and successful marriage and even fighting is just another form of communicating your fears and insecurities. The best way is to discuss your issues rationally, but even fighting is better than hiding everything under the carpet!
2. Have Your Private Time. You don't have to spend all your waking moments together. In fact, it is healthy to have some "Me" time everyday where you focus on yourself.
3. Have Your Own Friends. You might enjoy the company of a couple ocassionally, but you should maintain your friendships with your old friends and encourage your partner to do the same.
4. There is No Division of Labour! In modern marriages, it is NOT the job of the man to make money, and it is NOT the job of the woman to cook and clean. Both the partners are usally working these days. So the household chores should also be shared.
5. It is OK to Have Separate Bank Accounts etc. You don't need to have everything in joint accounts to prove your loyalty or love to your partner. It's ok to have a separate financial identity and invest your money as you see fit.
6. Respect. It is perhaps the most important tip. Respect your spouse as much as you love him/her.